Wednesday, April 28, 2010

Imprints on my Heart

I was just looking at some of my friend's blogs (because I am tired and I am avoiding doing what I should be doing - homework!) I'm behind in reading, months and months behind, which is too bad because many of my friends are excellent writers. As I read my friends' posts, I was observing that I seldom write (and publish) angry. Sometimes I write to vent, and occasionally I let Tom read it or read it aloud to him (which does wonders for me) but I think it takes a special kind of guts (and comfort with oneself) to write when you are sad or upset. At the point of publishing your anger, you really are putting yourself "out there".

Recently I decided I should always have a picture with my posts.
Even if the pictures don't really relate to the post, it's nice to have a visual reference.
Besides, I take SO MANY pictures, I *
SHOULD* share them with you!

I realized that I have been a bad friend lately. I have been so consumed with completing my school work and keeping up with the boys and house and Tom being out-of-work, that I really haven't had time for much else. I don't cook. I don't clean. I don't {gasp} sew. I don't write. I don't chat. I've just been focused on school-school-kids-school! :P Exhausting I tell you! It helps me realize sometimes people really want to be involved but they have to prioritize how much of themselves they can give and to whom.

May I share some thoughts with you that I had tonight? I have only just shared it with one friend. Today someone called to tell me how important I've been in their life. It was wild for me. I've been the one saying those things before, about a few special people. My Aunt says some people come into your life for a short time, but live a print on your heart for a lifetime! I warmly think of those people who've made those kinds of imprints on my heart. It was touching to hear how I've now returned the favor and life begins to travel full circle (a friend wrote about her idea of life moving in a spiral.) So, I just crossed over an event.

In any case, tonight I was thinking about friends. Some friends you grow with (I think these may be Best Friends), some friends you learn from, and some you teach. All friendships have a place, but they serve different needs. Have you ever heard the analogy about having different friends for different needs? One you can hang out with. One you can cry on the shoulder of. One you can laugh and let-loose with. Anyway, I was thinking of all these things as I read about someone not-having a best friend. They sure are special when they come along, and it's weird, I think when you find one, you treasure them all the more because they are so infrequent.

Being in Rock Springs, knowing it was so temporary, I knew I needed support, and started out (unconsciously) looking for the best friends I'd left behind in Arizona... at the beginning I even gravitated to people with the same first names! Somewhere along the line, I realized it's okay to have friends for a short time, and have fun, but not have a life-long bond. I continue to nurture one particularly close friendship. I sometimes mourn friendships lost or changed, but realize that as we grow and change, our friendships must also grow and change.

In a strange way, I found these pictures suited to my topic.
They remind me of the quote along the lines of
"Go often on the house of a friend, for the path soon covers over with weeds."
It's important to maintain our relationships, whether in town or far away, for they soon become clouded over, not to mention, being involved is, well, a great way to BE INVOLVED!

I know I'm totally rambling! I'm tired. I'm sore. AND, I'm STILL avoiding homework (at this point I'm so tired, I'll make the bed and then crawl into it (the dryer just finished my sheets!)) Thanks for allowing me to share my mental ramblings and musings; I appreciate it!!!


Becky said...

Call me later and I'll tell you a funny (but gross) story about ignoring the housework.

Permission to Unwind said...

What's a blog for, if not to ramble on about the day's thoughts, right?

I've been thinking a lot about friends lately, too, and for me it's been odd because so many people have all sort of "fallen" out of my life at once. I don't have any idea how it happened like that, and there wasn't a particular reason behind any of the drifting-apart, but it just seemed weird to me that it happened in a big swoop. This leads me to think it must be an important time for me to be more internal, or maybe it's the Universes way of preparing my life for new people or circumstances. AND, it's entirely likely that it is meant to be this way because my upcoming plans include a crazy school schedule (like what you've been through) and homeschooling and LIFE, and perhaps it's a good time for me to be able to shift my focus where it matters most. Nevertheless, it's not always easy when people come and go in your life. But I really value and treasure each friend, no matter how long or short our time together may be.

Speaking of friends, you've been on my mind and I hope things are moving forward in positive ways for you and your family. :)

suzanne said...

Dear Suzy

My life does sound busy for you and your family. I wish you all the best with your move. Homeschooling can be so challenging. I am not a guru on the matter but I will always hold Donna Simmons peaceful word in my heart..She said' take time off...a month , three if needed just to find yourself. Learn to breath and find your rhythmn again' Those words almost gave me permission to reflect and gain inspiration to take on my homeschooling journey again. I have also de schooled myself to such an extent, that life just flows now..what will be will be. I do my best and I have happy kids.

Do visit again Suzy when you settle. I am a Suzy too. I am nicknamed Suzy Wong and Q by my childhood friends.~ My mom can only call me Suzy even though she was the one who named me 'Suzanne"!~

Warm regards